I mean it was incredibly ridiculous – so obviously Jared enjoyed it.

is basically that person that if they were on the NBC Rockefeller Tour
and got chosen to pretend to give a live weather broadcast in front of a
crowd of the most-touristy-tourists who still watch reruns of ER, to illustrate the innate difficulties of talking while pointing at nothing – like you
know he would ham the fuck up all over that green screen to the point where that NBC Page would have to take that screen down from the wall, take it out back and hose it the fuck down. Like,
Jared is basically Honey Boo Boo child. We know this.
So obvs he was all about the
visual gags today.

And yes, while unnecessary, I rather enjoyed
that greenscreen. It was def a new technology the crew created for
Wonderland’s production studios and they were pushing it out for a test
run. And for being something they were still working out the kinks on –
it was pretty smooth. I was kinda impressed. It’s definitely probably
not gonna be used for every VyRT, nor should it be, (unless it’s to
superimpose Shan into these VyRTs – which while we already know his
feels on appearing on VyRT, may be the only way we can see him outside
of an event.) You can’t deny it provided some fun little moments that
made an entirely talk-heavy vyrt chat go by so fast. I mean. When I
first brought it up I totally had Wayne’s World flashbacks (“Hi…I’m
in…Delaware.” <— just may be the least known line ever repeated from
1992’s iconic Wayne’s World but said as if we all should know it cause
no doi).

And was it not entertaining to watch them get such a silly kick out
of the backdrops? I mean, whatever it was doin’, it did it for me.

Watching Jared sillybilly himself all over it;

Emma filing in silence momentarily from an inexplicable outer space-desert, like an arts school kid making her first short film;

Jared2 rapping at us in an official red camp mars hoodie from a jade-green forest like he had been awake
for 6 days and had run out of viable drinking water 49 hours ago so he
just started licking the dew off some leaves not realizing their Quaalude-like properties;

Tomo inexplicably reporting live from a bamboo forest somewhere deep in
what remains of China’s lush land, while Jared stood close beside
chitchattering on about Camp Mars accommodations while unconsciously
allowing his hands to travel around his body – mostly finding their
sneaky-way down his chillax pants, like lost puppies finding their way

and home

and home

and home

To the point where someone off-camera basically had to ask T & J
to step closer to camera so Jared’s lost puppies wouldn’t totally break
the internets.

Also? When would we have ever gotten a chance to
watch Jared warm his alabaster tumtum on a digital backdrop of a bundle
of sticks and flames – if not for that green screen?

Letobless that green screen.
#TeamGreenScreen (for today at least.)


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